The Local Church

From Vanity to Reality

I was born in New York City into a Jewish family. Even at a very young age there was a desire within me to know God. To most Jews God is objective--the creator of the heavens and the earth--having no direct relationship to man. In fact, many Jews have even given up any desire to know or think about God at all. This was the case in my family.

As I grew up I participated in all of the activities that a young person is involved in, such as sports, schoolwork, art, friends, etc. But even as a young person there was something inside of me that remained unsatisfied. At that time the war in Vietnam was a current issue and many of the people that I knew were politically active. I also looked into that to see what was behind it. Eventually I found it to be disappointing and quite vain. I went to a university and gave myself fully to artwork, spending hours in the studios painting and drawing. It seemed that the more I pursued so many things, the more intensified was my sense of dissatisfaction.

At this time, 1968-1970, the hippie movement started. I was very attracted by this “alternative life-style”. So, I came to California in 1970, and gave myself to this “movement”. At first this new realm seemed promising and real. Eventually, I realized that what started out looking like one thing, was manifested to be something else. After five years of living in Berkeley and experimenting with nearly every possible way of living, I reached a point where I had given up hope. Just like Solomon's experience in Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 “and whatsoever mine eyes desired I kept not from them, I withheld not my heart from any joy; for my heart rejoiced in all labor; and this was the portion of all my labor. Then I looked on all the works that my hands had wrought and on the labor that I had labored to do; and behold, all was vanity and vexation of spirit and there was not profit under the sun.”

Then one day a close friend of mine told me that she had found the Lord. She invited me to go to a meeting of the local church with her. That evening I went with her and in a simple way I called upon the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. It had never dawned on me that the meaning of my existence could have anything to do with God. It is really too wonderful. I found that to be a human living is so full of meaning: man can receive God and know God in an intimate and subjective way. When we call upon the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, the very God enters into us (Romans 8:10-11). God comes into our being to dwell in us and to fill us with Himself. To we who have received Him and know Him, He is so rich and enjoyable.

It has been almost twenty-six years since the day that I was saved and baptized. My deep sensation is that I have come home. My experience is now one of rest, enjoyment and satisfaction. Day by day I am enjoying the rich and bountiful supply of the living Lord in me. God to me is no longer objective, theoretical or far away. He is so real, subjective and available. It is too marvelous that as human beings we can have such an intimate relationship with God Himself. This is the real satisfaction which I had been seeking all my life. Now I have a normal life which is not a vanity but is everything I had once hoped to find; it is a life filled with the enjoyment of God Himself living in me.

L.D. | Back to List

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